The skies - they wept bitterly for me today, because all the tears in me have been cried.

That's the thing about love - it has absolutely nothing to do with self. Nothing.

I have discovered

a whole new world

of people –

young, beautiful,

naive and vulnerable,

the way we were

so long ago –

I love them

for surviving

this violent peace –

In this farewell, There is no blood
There is no alibi
Cause I've drawn regret
From the truth
Of a thousands lies
So let mercy come and wash away
What I've Done
I'll face myself
To cross out what I've become
Erase myself
and let go of what I've done
Put to rest, What you thought of me
Well, I clean this slate
With the hands, Of uncertainty
So let mercy come, And Wash away
What I've Done
I'll face myself
To cross what I've become
Erase myself
And let go of what I've done
For what I've done
I start again
And whatever pain may come
Today this ends
I'm forgiving what I've done
I'll face myself
To cross out what I've become
Erase myself
And let go of what I've done
What I've Done
Forgetting what I've done

But listen carefully to the sound Of your loneliness Like a heartbeat, drives you mad In the stillness of remembering What you had, And what you lost

Love's a hard decision to risk impending choke,
But love will keep you wishing and my heart will keep me broke.
...Rivers flow into the oceans, but oceans never fill,
I want to let you know me but know I never will...

And then the reality of it all struck me.
Like a myriad of lightning bolts thrust like daggers into my heart and mind;
Shattering my innocent, ignorant spirit into shards.
Then the skies tore open and wept,
Wept with, for and within me;
Bitter, bitter, piercing tears,
Whilst the wind howled and screamed
Its most mournful song,
Until the waters rose so high,
I was swept away helpless, hopeless
With the sheer sorrow of it all.

...Insomniac...

Isn't it funny how active military members who have wittnessed first hand what is actually going on in Iraq and Afganistan are donating their money to the one candidate who has been advocating for many years an immediate withdrawal from the war? So they are willing to potentially sacrifice their jobs so that the war can be stopped! Of all people, those in the military are the ones who have truly seen and been a part of what is  happening in this war, and they want it stopped. Now that is truly saying something.

I feel like a child who cannot wait for Christmas day, though it is still January. Yet somehow instinctively, she knows that this year, Christmas will not be. How foolish to believe it, to hope and wait for what will never come.